it's endearing really...

If you've been reading my blog for awhile, you know that much of my blog consists of me, lovingly sharing with you the inner-life of Matt. This of course, is entertaining, because if you know Matt publicly, he appears to be but is not in fact always 1 - very serious, 2- practically perfect in every way, as Mary Poppins might put it.

Many of you have reported increased affection for Matt since I have started this blog - I don't know if it's because you feel like you know him better, or if you just plain feel sorry for him, since he lives and deals with me, but whatever it is... it is what it is. (I know some of you hate that term - I used it especially for you.)

So far, we have learned that Matt 1 - loses things a lot, 2- secretly loves to dance and is good at it but won't perform for you, 3- watches the weather channel almost as frequently as ESPN, and of course there is so much more. Up till now, however, I have failed to blog about a major idiosyncrasy of Matt's...

Did you know that my intelligent man is what I like to call "directionally challenged?" Oh yes he is. Big time. And now is the time to tell you about it.

I knew it was bad in college. There was a coffee shop, Sweet Eugene's, literally 1/2 a mile and two turns away from my sorority house. It was very easy; From the Sorority house you take a right, drive till the street dead ends, take a left, drive till you see the coffee shop. Somehow it wasn't clicking for Gibby. I think he got it by the end of the year and then...

I moved. One street directly behind the sorority house, but I still moved. And, as you would expect... utter confusion for Matt. I assure you Matt is not dumb - his brain just perceives space differently, and ineffectively for the sake of navigating, but I'm sure the way his brain works is good for other things like... well the Lord knows.

Anyway, this brings us to (not really but I am bringing us to) last night. Last night Matt and I were borrowing my dad's monstrosity of a truck, also known as "The Boss," because we had to use it to move a couch. Because of the fact that our street is narrow, and because of the location of where our neighbor parked her car, we were forced to leave our street going the opposite way that we normally go, which really isn't a problem because the street loops around.

So. We get to the end of the street where Matt is CLEARLY supposed to take a LEFT. Now, aside from the fact that it's just plain obvious which way he is supposed to go, we also go on walks through this place frequently, and trust me there is just no excuse. So Matt is at the stop sign, and I can FEEL it in my bones that he is about to turn RIGHT instead of LEFT.

Timeout - background info: I've been chastised by my loving husband in the past for telling him to turn right or left when we are in his own neighborhood (like the house he lived in for 6 years before going to college). Usually the control freak in me just blurts out, "Turn here," even though Matt is very aware of where he is supposed to turn.

Time in. So, contrary to natural impulse, I didn't blurt out, "Turn left," because 1 - It should have been obvious and 2 - I was learning from experience.

As you could expect, Matt turns RIGHT, and as you would also expect I immediately asked him, "Where are you going?" It takes a few seconds for it to click with him why I might be asking that question, and then he smiles (cause he knows that I know this weakness of his), and he says, "Oh, I should have turned left. I thought we were on a different street."

Sweet darling. What I want to say in those situations is, "C'mon babe, you're smarter than that."

There is another part to this story, and although I fear that this post is getting too long, I must let you know that...

Every now and then I play a game when Matt is driving and I completely keep my mouth shut about where he might possibly be taking us, even if I know that he is going the wrong way. This opportunity only presents itself occasionally because usually we are under time constraints. It is fun to figure out how long it will take him to figure out that he went the wrong way - usually it's not too long, to his credit.

Then there is the occasional time when I am not paying attention (i.e. on the phone, putting on makeup, sleeping), and he goes the wrong way. Usually my reaction to this particular navigation error is something along the lines of, "How does he ever get anywhere by himself!?" To which he replies, "Babe, you've gotta just go with the flow."

Yes, if your sense of direction is like Matt's, you have to go with the flow. Also, if your sense of direction is like my best friend, Sarah's, you get really good at going with the flow. Other people, like me, find no liesure in getting lost; it is a waste of time. Taking the scenic route on purpose? That's one thing. On accident is a totally different thing for which I have no appetite.

Now, don't you love Matt even more after that?