oh... my... goodness...

Yes, I am at Starbucks. What is new?

Here's what's new. I don't typically come here on Saturday nights, but Matt is at a bachelor party, and I had some reading to do.

Yeah, so there's a sweet old man here singing his own country songs with his guitar. If only you were here to experience this with me. Here are the lyrics to the chorus of the first song he played.

"I wish I had a pet, I wish I had two, I wish I had three, I wish I had four. Don't you?"

Bless his heart. We are all clapping for him.

weekend entitlements

This whole fasting thing has served to uncover a lot of unfounded principles that I unconsciously live by... and it's only been 3 days. Unfounded principle # 1? On the weekend I am entitled to eating and doing whatever I want, no matter how explicitly counterproductive it is.

Think about it. During the week, abstaining from unnecessary pleasures is really not that difficult because you're in productive work mode. But come Friday around 4 or 5, what do you want to do? Relax, indulge, be totally listless and not feel guilty about it. Yes, it is much more of a chore to abstain from dessert and Facebook on the weekend. (I didn't want to admit it, but I made Matt change my FB password. It is really that bad.)

Surely there are several reasons why so many of us voluntarily sell ourselves into the weekend trance.

But today, thanks to the fasting, instead of living in this typical hypnosis, I have a clear mind. This clarity makes me more inclined to worship the Lord, to pray, to consider what my purpose will be for the next 10 minutes and the next 10 years. And I do, in fact, feel happier... for what it's worth.

So, these weekend activities are gifts, not entitlements. And as soon as I begin to feel entitled to anything, I become a slave to it. Perhaps there is truth to the 80's song, "Everybody's working for the weekend." My unsolicited advice? Work for the Lord; let the weekend work for you.

missing in action

I'm pretty sure - not 100% certain - but pretty darn sure that our mail woman has been checking out on Fridays and Saturdays for AWHILE. I can picture her in her little blue uniform at happy hour somewhere, laughing, while all of our mail is being stockpiled in her little truck till Monday rolls around.

I'm also not skeptical.

-------------------------------
Coming next week: Familial Fridays. I have a lot of family members to finish blogging about.

new years resolution and lent update

Since I know you guys are wondering, I'd like to report that Matt is officially still in Chapter 2 of the Hillary Clinton Biography. It is sitting proudly on our coffee table, waiting patiently for his undivided attention. Of course, the biography has competition, and that would be me. Looks like I am winning.

On the "lent" front, I keep making subconscious migrations towards my forbidden activities. Sadly, these things have become such consistent habits that I do them without even thinking about it. Fortunately, my conscious mind has done a very good job of prohibiting me from partaking... so far. Am I the only crazy one who deal with this?

Oh how we love our blog readers!

how NOT to read the Bible

I was reading my daily chapter of Proverbs yesterday and came across this verse:

"It is better to live in a corner of the roof than in a house shared with a contentious woman." (Proverbs 25:24)

Immediate thought: "Good thing I'm not a dude; I don't have to worry about living with a contentious woman...or in a corner of the roof for that matter..."

After God's intervention: "...on second thought, maybe I should see to it that Matt doesn't have to live with a contentious woman."

Hmm. Perhaps.

Oh and P.S....

As far as I know Matt is not fasting from anything except the things that he has to fast from by default because of me. Ahem, television. Which means he is going to have to kick me out of the house when March Madness rolls around. Anyone want to start a book club?

Fat Tuesday

Fun fact: I LOVE 40 day fasts. I do them all the time (but usually they only last like 20 days, sometimes 10.). This might be because I am an "all or nothing" person... it might also be because I am a loser, but that's really not for me to decide. Life would be much better if I could learn Matt's approach... moderation.

Unfortunately, last week I participated in Fat Monday, Fat Tuesday, Fat Wednesday, Fat Thursday, Fat Friday, Fat Saturday, Fat Sunday, AND Fat Monday again. I was trying to make it all the way through today so that I could REALLY get motivated for 40 days of asceticism starting tomorrow, but my extreme lack of self-control for the past week has made it impossible for me to enjoy indulging in anything else on this lovely Fat Tuesday.

So I have already finished off all of the ice cream and candy in the house, and today I am getting mentally prepared for the lent of a lifetime, which includes but is not limited to a fast from Facebook, Television, and sweets. And for the record, I have never attempted to fast from sweets for lent before, so this could potentially get very ugly.

Hope you have a very FAT Tuesday.

miracle juice

Does anyone else love the fact that at HEB these days there are almost two entire aisles devoted to non-alcoholic beverages? Cause when we were growing up it was pretty much water, soda, plain tea, and juice. Now there's stuff like Starbucks in a bottle, herbal tea for every ailment that you've never heard of, organic-pomegranate-infused-super-antioxidant-rich-cancer-fighting-magic-juice, and kombucha. I love this aisle, even though my practical self realizes it's just a slew of clever marketing schemes.

Anyway, this weekend as I walked past all the special juice, I remembered a conversation Matt and I had awhile back that's worth sharing.

Leah (in ditz mode): "I wish there was some sort of drink that tasted good, that was healthy, that would suppress my appetite, that didn't have any calories, and that would speed up my metabolism."

Matt (think somewhat condescending tone of voice here): "They do. It's called WATER." (Why is he always soooooooo practical!??!)

Leah: "No, but I want something ELSE." (Sort of sounds like a 2 year old now that I think about it.)

The end. Happy Monday! Maybe go get yourself some miracle coffee to make it through the work day.

"abreadcrumb and fish."

Sorry in advance about the title of this post. Just poking a little fun at our Christian subculture again (love the church)... but seeeeriously!? (If you don't know what I am talking about, click here.)

Anyway, have any of you walked past an Abercrombie & Fitch recently? I was out shopping for a friend on Friday when I decided that Abercrombie smells like a junior high dance. Think adolescent boys with acne and braces who are overcompensating for their lack of manhood with an insane amount of cologne. I asked Matt, and he admitted to wearing Abercrombie cologne in Jr. High and High School. No wonder he was so dreamy back then. :)

so much for objectivity

This video is hilarious. CNBC anchor goes off his rocker over the president's plan to fix the housing market. We feel your pain, buddy.

Update: Not sure if he is actually an anchor.

the two become one

I've decided to merge my "Leah only" blog with my "Leah and Matt together" blog. Now those of you who subscribe to both will only need to subscribe to one, and I won't have to keep feeling like I live a double life.

Of course I don't live a double life, but it was beginning to feel that way since the content, tone, and writing styles of the two blogs are almost entirely different. Only time will tell how this plays out.

Later!!

what the cougars are saying... and other news

The other day we were out and a woman in her late 40s or early 50s told Matt that he looks like Roger Federer. She also made sure to let us know that she finds Roger Federer very attractive...You do the math. Of course I agree with her, for Matt's sake.

A few weeks ago, a dude at Starbucks told me I looked like Jenna Bush. He made the same type of follow up comment as the cougar. Something along the lines of, "You may not agree with her dad, but that doesn't mean she's not attractive..." Brilliant statement.

Speaking of Starbucks, what does it mean when the baristas at 3 different locations in Austin recognize you and the baristas at 2 different locations know your name? What does that say about me as a person? Unemployed? They probably think so, but they are wrong. "Independent Contractor" is more like it.

Speaking of baristas, Darren, my barista friend, wants me to tell all of my blog friends that he says hello. Darren has a wife of 14 yrs and two kids, FYI. Darren told me the secret to staying married 14 yrs is putting your spouse above yourself. Good thinking, Darren!

Speaking of blogging, did anyone else watch Saturday Night Live this past weekend? Kristen Wiig appeared on the Weekend Update segment with Seth Meyer as "Blog Lady." She was wearing a sweater, holding a coffee cup and making fun of people. The skit was hinting at the fact that she was the loser, even though she was convinced otherwise. I laughed, but then after I thought about it, I asked Matt if I should take it personally.

Cause let's be perfectly honest here... I spend a considerable amount of time blogging, drinking coffee, and making fun of people. (Read "more you never wanted to know about the Starbucks ditz" if you don't know what I am talking about.) Matt just laughed, so I don't know what that means.

Hope you are all having an excellent Tuesday! Till next time...

Happy Birthday, Silly!

Happy Birthday, Sarah!!! :) Love you, crazy!!!

Valentine's Schmalentines

I was originally planning on writing a post to make fun of Valentine's Day.... until we had our best Valentine's celebration yet. I've detailed the date in easy-to-read bullet points for you. Enjoy!

• We celebrated on Friday the 13th. Good decision on our part.
• Matt brought home a purse I had mentioned to him and also a dozen roses. Go Matt! Unfortunately, he did not address me as his "bride" in the card. I'm happy to report that he did get the pajama gram and teddy bear memo and that his mom did not pick out the purse.
  
• On the way to the restaurant, Matt realized that he left his wedding ring on our bathroom counter. Oops. Sadly for both of us, I have chub-chub fingers and Matt has skeleton fingers, so he was able to wear my Aggie Ring (backwards) on his ring finger.
• We went to Perry's Steakhouse. We took advantage of valet parking to avoid any hassle. (Unfortunately, we have learned the hard way that trying to find free parking downtown on the weekend will stress both of us out and cause an argument, ruining the 1st half of our dinner.)
• We are both admittedly high culture virgins. Somehow we can pull it off when we are with my Dad, but not alone. For example, when we arrived at our table, I waited for Matt to pull out my chair, and he didn't catch on, so I just sat down. After the hostess left, he got really embarrassed because he realized he probably should have done that. Believe me, it was awkward.
  
• We didn't order the $1500 bottle of wine this time. Bummer, right? We did get a Sonoma County Merlot (don't remember the name) for those of you who find it interesting (ahem, Dad). We like to pretend we know what we are talking about and guess the flavors in the wine. Matt actually guessed correctly the last time we played the game. This time he guessed hickory. Nope, sorry babe - oak, plum, and vanilla. Good try though.
• I seriously considered ordering the $85 filet mignon from the special cow (obviously the terminology they used was much fancier than this). But, to be perfectly honest, I was only doing it so that I could blog about it, and Matt had already gone all out with the flowers and the gift, so I decided to stick with the regular filet. Matt got the 3 Peppercorn NY Strip. I'm going to go ahead and say that mine was better.
• About halfway through the dinner I made eye-contact with a very familiar looking man. After much speculation, Matt managed to sneak a peek and confirmed that it was in fact Rick Perry! Perhaps you have heard of him? I'm going to venture out and say that he knew we recognized him.
• We spent the rest of our dinner talking about what we would to say the governor if we were to take the opportunity. (That requires its own separate blog post, which may or may not follow.) Of course neither of us actually did talk to him, and I was disappointed that I didn't have my Who's Who letter to show him.
  
• Mmmm. We had creme brulee (my favorite) for dessert, and then we left.
• I officially woke up feeling 9 months pregnant (happy valentine's day to me), so I guess you could say we ate well.

Finally, Happy Valentine's Day to you! Please, share your special stories!

"Hey Matt, Who's Who?"

Do you know me at all? Do you know how I have spent the last 5 1/2 years of my life? If so, then you will find this post HILARIOUS.

I got this really special piece of mail this week. It reads as follows:

"Dear Leah Gibson,

You were recently chosen [emphasis mine] as a potential candidate to represent the professional and business community of Austin, Texas in the Biltmore 2009 Honors Edition of Who's Who Among Executives and Professional Women.

We are pleased to notify you that your candidacy was formally approved February second, two thousand nine. Your confirmation will be validated within seven business days following our receipt of your enclosed Verification..."

The letter goes on w/ the last paragraph reading, "Ms. Gibson, on behalf of our Committee I salute your accomplishments. Welcome to the Biltmore Who's Who roster."

Umm yeah...breathe and laugh for a moment.

The reason this is funny is that I don't have any business accomplishments. I'm not trying to be overly self-deprecating either. It is just the truth.

(By the way, you know it's really bad when you call your accomplished sister to tell her the news - as a joke - and she starts laughing hysterically.)

Nevertheless, the new line in the Gibson household is, "Hey, who's who?" We think we are funny.

more you never wanted to know about the starbucks ditz

Note: See previous post.

If I am the only one who finds this entertaining, then that is perfectly fine with me.

• She apparently got in 6 car wrecks in high school.
• She wanted to get a Mustang, but she didn't want to get a "nice car" because she's been in so many car wrecks.
• She hates Math. (Could have guessed that one.)
• She wants a career in child psychology. (Read: Do your research before you send your children to a psychologist.)
• She twirls her hair.
• She is wearing a pink t-shirt, pink shorts, and pink tennis shoes, and she ordered a pink strawberry frappuccino.

You can argue that I am a terrible person for making fun of this girl, but I promise if you were here, you would do it too. (I am aware that doesn't make this right.) I am sure if I knew her, I would love her.

surely you will all agree that I watch too much TV

Have you seen this Cheetos commercial?



Well, now you have. And I feel like I am IN it right now. I am officially the only other customer left in this entire Starbucks store because of this dingbat girl who is talking waayyyy too loud for her own good. I am dumber for having listened to her.

Favorite part so far: (She's very clearly on a first coffee date.)

"My best friend, like my very best friend, we're like going to be each other's maids of honor - well, like she lives in Dallas, and earlier this year, we went like 4 months without seeing each other, and I was about to like DIE by the time I saw her."

Okay, I am mean. But it immediately reminded me of the Cheetos commercial, and I had to share.

How to Ruin your Valentine's Day (Important Advice for Husbands & Boyfriends)

If you want to ruin your Valentine's Day, then you should go ahead and buy your wife or girlfriend a Pajama Gram or a Vermont Teddy Bear. I have heard commercials for both of these products on the radio and TV, and let me just say that they are lying to you.

The Vermont Teddy Bear advertisement essentially says that flowers are boring and that if you send your wife or girlfriend a teddy bear at work, she will love you, and all of her coworkers will just be really impressed. It is a lie. If I received a Teddy Bear at work, I would be embarrassed. Take my word for it, and stick with flowers. Chocolate will even work, but not a teddy bear, please.

Although I personally would not prefer it, the Pajama Gram is not that bad of a gift in itself UNLESS your wife/girlfriend/fiancee has seen the commercial... and then it's pretty much over. No hope for you. The commercial basically appeals to lazy, last-minute men who haven't put any thought into the gift. See for yourself.



I personally can't stand this commercial, especially the last 10 seconds. Matt, if you're out there, NO PAJAMA GRAMS.

the sixth love language

All this time I thought Matt's love language was acts of service. While that's partly true, I realized today that his love language is actually... food!!

Yes, he appreciates when I do the laundry or clean the bathroom, but he LOVES when I cook. And he LOVES when I bring him lunch at the office, and he LOVES going out to eat.

So although you can't tell by the way his jeans fit, Matt's love language is officially FOOD.

Acts of service and words of affirmation are a close 2nd & 3rd.

stuff you always wanted to know about Matt. (you don't wanna skip this one.)

Matt is an "out of sight, out of mind" person if there EVER was one. This explains why he can't "find" anything in the house. (See previous posts, finding things and more mattisms). For real, we have about 60 tubes of chap stick, and he won't be able to find any of them unless they are dangling from a string at eye-level.

I am mildly OCD, just mildly. I don't mind piles of junk unless they are neat piles. Example: When we get the mail I'd prefer that we immediately sort it and throw away the junk, but if for some reason we don't, then it needs to be stacked in a neat pile. But Matt is out of sight, out of mind, so when I put mail or anything else in a temporary pile for neatness sake, he forgets about it. Thank goodness for auto pay.

So under one roof, we have the girl who likes for everything to have a place and to always and immediately put things where they belong, and the guy who would rather take up the entire surface area of every counter and every table and every floor in the house with all of the items he can't afford to forget about. Now, this poses a unique challenge for us when we consider Matt's reading habits.

Matt likes to read about 7 books at a time. But, like many, he has a bad habit of not finishing them. And he's a busy dude, so if he does finish, it takes about 7 months. He read David McCullough's book, 1776 a few years ago, and I'm pretty sure it took from January to August. To his credit, he did read The Same Kind of Different as Me in record time(for him), but apparently that one is the type you can't put down.

So surely you are wondering how any of this relates. Well, when Matt is reading his 7 books, he likes to keep them out. Two on the bedside table, one on the kitchen table, two on the coffee table, one in his car, etc. You're getting the picture. Of course, I never read more than 2 books at a time, and I finish all of them and keep them neatly tucked away in a book bag.

Needless to say, I have spent a good amount of time the last 3 yrs straightening up books and neatly stacking them or returning them to their home on the bookshelf. (I actually discovered that if I put a book that Matt is reading on the bookshelf, he will forget he's reading it.) Now, I know you're wondering where I am going with all of this.

I was excited about Matt's New Year's Resolution this year, which is to actually FINISH more books, which means- ONE AT A TIME! (Yes! The bedside table will finally catch a break.) But I don't know how much confidence I have that it will work out, and you are about to understand why...

You'd think someone like Matt, in his effort to finish more books, would pick up a few 200 pagers. Like, why don't you read The Shack? A pleasant and easy 200 pages. But NO. This weekend Matt decides it would be a good idea to embark on a 600 page journey through Hillary Clinton's life. Can anyone else see why I am losing confidence here?

I will be sure to let you know when he finishes. Oh, and for the record, Matt wants you all to know that he has already finished a book this year.

Caution: soap box.

I am sure Matt will forgive me for including my own personal rants on "our" blog. I've been keeping this one in for awhile now.

A couple of weeks ago, I saw this TV commercial implying that high fructose corn syrup was healthy and natural. Of course, I was mortified. I am completely put off by the deceit of food companies who convince the general public that their food is healthy in an effort to increase sales.

Here is the commercial.



The website they are advertising, www.sweetsurprise.com, features several studies which conclude that high fructose corn syrup isn't bad for you, or that it is just the same as table sugar. (Let me go ahead and say that they are both bad for you, so comparing HFCS to sugar is sort of a joke.) The website also boasts, "The U.S. Food and Drug Administration granted high fructose corn syrup 'Generally Recognized as Safe' status for use in food, and reaffirmed that ruling in 1996 after thorough review."

Ever heard of a lobbyist?

So of course I appreciated ALL of the creative comebacks on YouTube, and decided to share my favorite.



:) Happy Thursday.

"take a big glass of RELAX"

I am pretty sure Matt saw me change from Dr. Henry Jekyll to Mr. Edward Hyde right before his very eyes today. Seriously, it is amazing how a full bladder and rush hour traffic will change you from a normal person to an evil villain.

Long story short, I had to go #1 at like 3:00, but we had to be somewhere at 3:30, and due to time constraints I never got to go. Two hours later, we were trying to leave a crowded parking lot, and I still needed to go. In hindsight, I should have stopped to go before we left the event, but we were trying to beat the crowds. I also should have let Matt drive.

So two things are going through my head. 1- I really have to pee. 2- Matt has already missed like three hours of work today, and he needs to get back. These things are not helpful in bumper to bumper traffic.

Of course there was a lot of shouting and trash talk (at the other drivers) the whole way back to Matt's office. But I think the last string (for Matt) was when I started trying to make eye contact at a stoplight with some dude behind me who was upset that I didn't run a yellow light. I wanted to give him the evil eye. Haha. :) I really should not share these things with anyone.

Actually, I forgot that right as I was trying to pull into the driveway of Matt's office, there was a car leaving the office parking lot, and instead of being on the RIGHT side of the driveway, she was in the very middle of the driveway... so I couldn't pull in. So I yelled, "YOU'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DRIVEWAY, LADY!!!!!!!!!!" And dramatically pulled around the building to the other entrance. Matt looked at me like I was possessed by something, to which I innocently replied, "What? She's gonna cause a wreck!" Ha. :)

Needless to say, I parked, and he got out as fast as he could. I went inside, took care of business, and came out a normal person. I am proud to report that I did not raise my voice once on the way from his office to the house. Of course we can all look back and laugh at this now.

(1- The title of this post is something Matt tells me OFTEN. 2- For those of you who are worried about this, I appreciate your concern, and promise that I will continue to repent and ask forgiveness and resolve to change until I am cured of road rage. I believe that day is coming. :) 3- Sorry if this was TMI for you.)