we can laugh about it now

In the last week, I have had two spouts of uncontrollable weeping. I am going to go ahead and blame it on my "condition." (Note: My condition is also to blame for the lack of a uniform verb tense in this post.)

First episode: It's 12:30am and I can't sleep, so I decide to take a shower. While doing so, I drop my razor on my foot, and it starts bleeding uncontrollably - literally looks like a murder scene in my shower.

At this point, I decide that the world has done me a serious injustice, and start crying and screaming, "Why? Why did this happen to me!?" (Note: It didn't really hurt at all, I was just upset that it happened.) Realizing that I had not yet received a response from my sleeping husband, I cried ALL THE LOUDER... until he got up and came to check on me in the shower.

This is when I morphed from a weeping victim to an angry monster of a wife and started screaming at Matt to get me a paper towel. He patiently cooperated and after we got the blood cleaned up from the entire bathroom, I proceeded to cry myself to sleep for a solid 15 additional minutes.

Second Episode: This morning at about 6:30 or 7:00am. As my growing uterus continues to impede on my bladder, I can no longer sleep through the whole night without having to get up to go to the bathroom. No big deal if I could go back to sleep right? But, instead I get back in bed, toss and turn for an hour, give up, and end up staying awake till I can't take it anymore.

This morning, I was almost back asleep on the couch when it was time for Matt to get ready for work. So, as he starts making noise (not on purpose, but you know how everything sounds amplified when you're trying to sleep), I storm to our bedroom where I can shut the door on the noise.

The only problem is that our bedroom is the hottest room in the house, and since my body is now an incubator, I am constantly radiating with heat. Translation = UGH! At this point I throw all of the sheets onto the floor and start making angry noises. Not satisfied with the room temp, I leave our room, slamming the door behind me, and I march to the guest room. Oh, and on the way, I furiously punch the down button on our AC about 7 degrees.

As soon as I arrive at my new location, the weeping begins... uncontrollable weeping. Matt eventually made it back to the guest room to console me. "I'm so tired and uncomfortable. I just want to fall asleep!"

Matt is so sweet and considerate, especially when I am being totally irrational. This morning, while weeping, I ask him a question he gets a lot when I'm being a brat, "Why do you love me? Why are you being nice to me!?"

I'm telling you the man deserves an award.